Humanitarian Bowl: Because "Boise" + "December" = "Humane"

Seriously, what the fuck? The idea behind this bowl originally was like the ideas behind the Hawaii and New Mexico bowls - free 12th or 13th game for Boise State, and it's a home game to boot. Well, turns out that of the now 12 years that this bowl's been around, Boise's been in the bowl a whopping total of 4 times. Good job, guys. At least this bowl has been pretty consistent about its WAC-ACC ties in the last 5 years (before that, god only knows), so they've got that going for them. So far, the ACC is 3-2 ... this year, someone's gotta win.

Maryland

This little inconsiderate shitbag of a team managed to give up more points than it scored - and still ended up at 7-5. You want road wins from these guys? Then it sucks to be you; only a relative de-pantsing of Clemson at high noon on a Saturday counted as a road win (Black Hole Theory: Clemson's talented on offense -> Maryland wins). They couldn't even beat MTSU on the road (final record: 5-7 - Black Hole Theory: they suck -> Maryland loses). Really, you could use the Black Hole Theory in most Maryland games this year; the only exceptions were Delaware (close win), Eastern Michigan (blowout), and NC State, although that NC State win was their last loss of the year, so ...maybe that doesn't count. That being said, somewhere around the last month of the year the Black Hole collapsed in on itself, evidenced by blowout losses to Florida State and Boston College (although BC has nothing on offense, so maybe Black Hole Theory still applied; the FSU game was an aberration).

Predictably, these fuckballs can't do anything right; even their second-in-the-ACC passing numbers of 207 yards per game was good enough for 65th(!) nationally. You want defense? Fuck you! How's it feel to be outrushed AND outpassed on an average basis? That being said, Da'Rel Scott is the only thing that passes for (functional) talent on offense (959 yards on the season); you'd think that for all the press Darius Heyward-Bey gets, he'd average more than 3.5 catches per game. Of course, that's also the Maryland offense in a nutshell. Chris Turner blows.

Defensibly, they're pretty much terrible. Don't stop the run, don't stop the pass, only 8 INT against 17 TDs allowed through the air, allow nearly 20 first downs per game, can't pressure the QB, and can't penetrate past the line of scrimmage. So of course they only allow 36% of third down conversions. When it comes to turnovers, they blow - we'll just tell you they're -8 on the season and leave it at that.

What do they have to do to win? We have no fucking clue.

Nevada

Nevada's a 7-5 team who pretty much went 7-2 against anyone who wasn't Texas Tech, Missouri, or Boise State. Of course, beyond those three they didn't exactly play anybody of note; hhwhat-hever.

Nevada's mantra for the season has been to dominate the ground. They get outpassed 321-219 but make up for it with a 291-74 rushing edge, on average. Does it work? Like we said... roughly half of the time, sure. Nevada outrushed opponents in both wins and losses, but in wins the margin was +270 while in losses it was down to +130.

Colin Kaepernick owes his solid QB rating to a 19/5 ratio; the percentages (54.8%) and averages (7.4 ypa, 206.6 ypg) are pedestrian, but he's not going to burn the team with turnovers. In the option attack, he's chipping in 92.9 ypg rushing, to go with main back Vai Taua's 118.3; the two have combined to pound it in 30 times as well.

Nevada's passing game chips in about 220 ypg regardless of win or lose. It's the passing defense that matters here, giving up 385 ypg in losses to just 275 ypg in wins. TD/INT ratio is about 2:1 either way, but there's a 10% difference in completion percentage. Surprisingly, this team is practically even in turnovers in both wins and losses.

What's their strategy against Maryland? Simple - pound the ball, and don't get burned through the air. Maryland's a team who's already getting outrushed on the season, so the former shouldn't be too much of a concern. (put another way, if they can't even win the ground game against Maryland, they're just being outclassed) Chris Turner hasn't been great, and Maryland's success is actually inversely related to his passing numbers (go figure). The Terps are vastly better when they're rushing for 186 ypg in wins than they are when they're rushing for only 62 ypg in losses. So I'd actually go against Nevada's apparent defensive indicator of passing ypg and just focus on stopping the run. Win the ground game by 100-150 yards, and let Turner's mediocrity fall short of being able to turn the tide.

The Just-In-Time for the New Mexico Bowl Preview

The New Mexico was one of at least fifteen new bowls introduced last season, further strengthening the argument that a playoff would render the regular season meaningless (under the current system, bowl eligible is synonymous with "doesn't suck balls" -- only anymore, even that isn't necessarily true). It's played in New Mexico, and the bowl has conveniently invited their state's own university to EVERY NM Bowl so far. Interesting... Oh and also, the game trophy is a piece of pottery. It's not even from Pottery Barn, it's this homemade crap stolen from the Zia Pueblo Indian Reservation. I can't believe those white devils continue to just take and take from this land's native people.

New Mexico (by Coach Pendley)

New Mexico didn't really have a season that most people would term impressive. The best opponent they've played all year was BYU (a 31-24 loss); the best team they've beat is probably Air Force (34-31 win at home). They are who you think they are: a middling mid-major team that didn't really do a whole lot in the conference or out of it. A 29-27 win at Arizona is nullified by a 10-6 loss at UTEP (although 10 points was the lowest output on the season for UTEP). In-conference, they lost to the good teams (Air Force excepted) and beat the bad ones. It's only fitting that they're playing another team whose main distinction on the season was not having one - it's not like Nevada did much on the season, either.

That being said, the Lobos do boast Rodney Ferguson, who's the 4th leading rusher in the Mountain West; he averages nearly 100 yards a game and just over a TD on the ground. In addition to that, they possess one of the most potent 1-2 WR combinations that Nevada will see all year in Marcus Smith (7.2 catches/game) and Travis Brown (5.4 catches/game). Unfortunately, the aforementoned three guys are the New Mexico offense. Defensively, they don't do anything too well; their pass D isn't terrible, but they do allow a 56% completion rate. The only thing other than the aforementioned three players is PK John Sullivan, who's 26/29 on the season. In short, there's not a lot they do well, but they don't do anything terribly either. This is the kind of team that gets a bowl game?

Keys to Victory:
1: Win the last 10 minutes. Obviously the Lobos need to at worst keep it close for the first 50 too, but Nevada has been in a lot of close games this season (7 games within 7 points, 4-3 record). The last thing the Lobos want to risk is getting caught in a situation where the team they're playing has more experience than they do - especially given New Mexico's 0-4 bowl record this century. It's intangible hell. They also don't want to be caught down by 3, not having the ball, and watching Luke Lippincott's number get called 14 straight times. Don't get caught there.

2: Attempt a score on at least 67% of the possessions. John Sullivan is an excellent weapon, and Nevada's defense - especially on the ground - isn't much to phone home about. There's no reason that the Lobos can't average 30-40 yards a possession and dink and dunk Nevada to death here. If they get the ball inside the 35, no punting is allowed.

3: Play action. Ferguson is a legitimate weapon, the potency of which the Wolfpack haven't seen since practice - or against Idaho on gameday. Nevada's secondary isn't a threat to pick off a lot of passes, so don't be afraid to establish Ferguson early and start throwing it down the field.

Nevada Wolfpack (by Coach Lawrence)

In 2005, Nevada received their first bowl invitation in nine seasons - accepting a bid to play against UCF in the Hawaii Bowl - a thrilling multi-OT game which was won on a missed PAT! Last year, they again reached the bowl season to face off against the Miami Hurricanes in the MPC Computers Bowl, this time losing on an interception with only a few seconds remaining as they were nearing FG range down 21-20.

2007 has been a down year for the Wolfpack, with losses to Fresno State, Boise State, and Hawaii placing them clearly in the middle tier of the WAC. Despite a very potent and rounded offense, Nevada has been plagued by a suspect defense (they've lost games 69-67, 49-41, and 36-31) and inexperienced QBs - last year's starter, Nick Graziano, was replaced around midseason by redshirt Freshman Colin Kaepernick. The move worked out as Kaep has performed better statistically in every meaningful category, in part due to giving him on average five fewer attempts per game and relying more on the run. With CK in the Pistol, Nevada runs a modified read option and keeps the ball on the ground 61% of the time.

Defensively Nevada has been a team of two halves, performing well in the first half but coming out of the locker room (particularly the third quarter, where rushing is up 1.2 ypc and the opposing quarterbacks get their highest rating) not quite ready to resume play. This effect tends to compound itself, as Nevada performs better against both the pass and the run when they have the lead.

Gameplan:
1. Mix the run and the pass. New Mexico is solid against both, so their best bet is to keep the defense on its toes.

2. Have a cushion at the half. Sometimes you can't change who you are... a 10 point lead would be insurance against the halftime doldrums.

3. Don't be afraid if it gets ugly. Three of New Mexico's four losses have come when they've scored 10 points or less. Despite being involved in more low-scoring games, the Lobos aren't really that good at them.